Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I deserve this hangover.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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