I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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