When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize
