Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
