did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
