It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
