I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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