dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
