I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
it's great music for shaving your balls
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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