Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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