I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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