some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
