he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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