Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
BRING THE BAGELS
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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