apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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