I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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