What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
