kristin has been a bad kristin
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
