Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Randomize
