The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
