She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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