It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
