I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Well I just put wine in my tea
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
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