There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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