Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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