I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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