Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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