You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
