yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize