Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
