Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
