So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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