Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize