I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
