i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
