At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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