You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
