I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
