have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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