I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
