just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
