Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
