weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Randomize
