why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
He felt like a one man threesome
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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