I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
