They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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