yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
