so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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