You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
