But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
